Ten million years ago there was nothing but Soft land. The only human on earth was wandering the swamps and stopped dead in his tracks to see an Orange Crocodile . His pet wolf started to attack the Crocodile but it bit his wolf called Pepper but he forgot that when his wolf got bit he got really mad . Pepper ran round and jumped on the Crocodile and killed it . But what they did not know is that it was not dead .
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Amberley Y6 
Dear Bryan,
Well done for entering in the 100wc this week! I really liked that your story was set in the past, billions of years ago. This was different to a lot of the other stories I have read where they were normally set in the present! Just remember that you keep the same tense all the way through with your story ‘was bitten’ instead of ‘got bit’.
I think I would ‘stop dead in my tracks’ too if I saw a crocodile, especially because it was orange! The way you ended the story makes we wonder what is going to happen next because the crocodile was not dead!
A great effort and keep up the imaginative writing
From Mrs. Baldwin (100team)